MARKED OUT! …checked out… RAW 03/18/13

MARK OUT: To temporarily forget that wrestling is fake because something cool happened. Urban Dictionary

JOHN CENA / PRIME TIME PLAYERS Promo: MARKED OUT!

So Cena opens the show talking about his upcoming match with the Rock…who isn’t going to be on the show. Boring.

The Prime Time Players then came out, with Titus in costume, and they give a pretty entertaining back and forth. I actually enjoyed this segment, and it makes me like Titus O’Neal more and more. He could be a singles star in a couple of years IMO.

JOHN CENA def. DARREN YOUNG: …checked out…

Squash match for Cena to look like Superman. Ugh. Nothing I haven’t seen over and over again. NEXT!

RYBACK def. DAVID OTUNGA: …checked out…

Otunga jobs to RyHack, but did manage to get a little bit of offense in. RyHack then gets on the mic and tells Henry that they’ll meet again soon, which leads to the next segment…

RYBACK / MARK HENRY / TEDDY LONG / VICKIE GUERRERO segment: MARKED OUT!

I had been waiting for the announcement of Henry vs Ryback since they teased such a feud, and now we have it. Awesome. I love Henry as a heel, he’s such a great “monster” character, where I’m annoyed with RyHack’s face “monster” character. I know RyHack will never be able to get Henry up in the “Shell Shocked” either, but I kinda want him to try and fail…just cause…NEXT!

FANDANGO vs THE GREAT KHALI (didn’t happen…again…): …checked out…

Do I really have to say anything? #WASTEdango is just that…a waste. They’ve spent SERIOUS money on this guy’s entrance and everything, however he still hasn’t wrestled a match, and now we might see him take on Y2J at ‘Mania? Well I guess if you want him to have a big first victory, let it come from Jericho, but still. His character is so awful. Can’t stand it. Ugh.

R-TRUTH def. DAMIEN SANDOW via count out: …checked out…

I actually got excited about this once I saw it was Sandow facing R-Truth…but halfway into the match Sandow walks out…which is a great heel move…but I just couldn’t get into this match altogether, with the walk out just being the exclamation point on my “check-outedness.”

UNDERTAKER / CM PUNK segment: MARKED OUT!

I’m a mark for Taker…I’ll always mark out for him being on the show. Not to mention Punk was spectacular. I saw some reports about people not being happy with what he was doing with the urn…I thought it was great hahaha. Loved it. Can’t wait for this match on April 7^th.

*WWE Tag Team Champions* TEAM HELL NO def. PRIMO & EPICO: …checked out…

I mean…everyone knows that Primo & Epico will not win this match right? At least they got some good offense in, but Hell No was obviously the victors. Love me some Bryan and Kane…but it’s time for something new. Anyone else with me here?

CHRIS JERICHO / FANDANGO segment: MARKED OUT!

Jericho is classic. His versions of #WASTEdango’s name were hilarious to me. He’s so awful, and I’m glad they allowed Jericho to go wherever he wanted to with the guy. We’ve been tweeting about getting movie tickets from this loser’s gimmick since they announced that he exists. Love that Jericho went there.

*World Heavyweight Champion* ALBERTO DEL RIO def. Cody Rhodes: …checked out…

I checked out of this match…but loved Swagger coming down at the end of it to attack Rodriguez. He then posted a tweet today that said that in his America, you can’t cross our borders if you can’t walk across them. Brilliant heel work, but overall, I just didn’t enjoy this match.

RANDY ORTON / SHEAMUS def. 3MB: …checked out…

Didn’t care about this match. I only cared about the Shield showing up, because it got my interest back, but then Show comes out and they all just look at each other before leaving. Really anti-climactic. What is happening here? This is really becoming one of the worst Raws that we’ve seen all year, and we’re 3 weeks from ‘Mania. Man. WASTE.

DOLPH ZIGGLER def. KOFI KINGSTON: MARKED OUT!

Pretty good match. Ziggler gets the victory after Langston DESTROYS Kingston on the outside. Hell No comes out and makes the tag team match that EVERYONE has been dying to see…right? …wait…Ziggler and Langston are a tag team? So confusing as to why WWE Creative want to go this route…but oh well…bring it on I guess.

*Intercontinental Champion* WADE BARRETT def. CHRIS JERICHO and THE MIZ: MARKED OUT!

An IC title match as the main event? Really? Barrett’s been jobbing…or not even wrestling…and now his title is on the line in the final match of the night? Really?! Wow. Ok. So now the title is “important” again?

The match was pretty freakin’ good too. Y2J can make ANY performer look better, and this time he made TWO guys look better than they EVER have in the ring. Great match with a great ending. Probably one of the best things on the program.

TRIPLE H / PAUL HEYMAN / BROCK LESNAR contract signing: MARKED OUT!

Heyman is always awesome, add in Lesnar and HHH and of course I’ll enjoy it. This segment went a little long to me, but I thought it was still great.

RAW 03/18/13 OVERALL: …checked out…

Wow…where do I begin? There are 3 Monday Night Raws left before the BIGGEST WWE PPV of the YEAR…and this is what we get? This was probably the most unorganized, uneventful, unentertaining episode of Raw since the Royal Rumble. My power went out in the middle of the broadcast, and I wasn’t that upset about it. I wasn’t really enjoying myself in the first place. So I got to re-watch the program this morning, with fresh eyes and perspective…and it was just as bad. Bad booking and organization of matches makes the 3 hour show feel like 8 hours, which is just BRUTAL.

We have 2 more weeks until ‘Mania…I hope we can get something better for those 2 programs, because if they stay like what we got last night…we’re in for a LONG 4 hours come April 7^th, and quite possibly, an even longer year.

Follow Doug McDonald on Twitter and tune in to RSM WEEKLY this Thursday night LIVE at 7pm EST on www.ringsidemanners.com. 

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