What Does Vince McMahon Keep In His Briefcase?

This is another Ryback story. You’re within your rights to be sick of those, but hey–folks keep reading ’em, so we’ll keep reporting ’em. This time, it’s about Vince McMahon and what he keeps inside his briefcase.

The latest Conversation With the Big Guy podcast (transcribed by WrestlingInc), saw Ryback sharing some stories about WWE’s big boss, including what he carries in his suitcase. The answer? Pills, and lots of them.

“His suitcase that he carries around, his little luggage bag, is just filled with pills, like supplements. Yeah, I thought they were important documents in there and s–t, and maybe sometimes he throws, like, something important in there, but it’s his bag of pills. And I was just like… but he probably has them in a $10,000 Louis Vuitton bag or something or something specially ‘V.K.M.’ custom, leather made for him.”

Vince also apparently has a bit of an obsession with meaty legs, which is something.

“He wanted me out of the singlet and [said], ‘Goddamnit, I want you in trunks!’ And ‘show off those meaty legs!’ Oh, he loves a good pair of legs. It f–king didn’t help me at all because of f–king attorneys and sticking up for myself because they were assholes first, but lesson learned: don’t stick up for yourself, guys. I’m kidding. Yeah, hell of a pair of legs.”

Is this where we make the usual joke about Vince and big, sweaty men? No? That one’s played out? Oh, well, we tried.