Date: April 30, 2017
Location: SAP Center, San Jose, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., Corey Graves
And now, the most oddly booked, unnecessary and likely meaningless pay per view of the year! We’re four weeks removed from Wrestlemania and somehow it seems like a far more distant memory. This was going to be your run of the mill rematch pay per view but the Superstar Shakeup has rendered a lot of the top matches worthless. Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt is now non-title while Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho haven’t interacted in weeks. Fun for everyone you see. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows
Back with Anderson breaking up a hot tag attempt at the last minute, only to have the second attempt work a few seconds later. Cass starts cleaning house with the corner splashes, only to have Enzo make a blind tag. Gallows pulls him off the apron a second later for a big crash but Cass breaks up the Magic Killer. A small package finishes Gallows at 6:39.
Result: Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Anderson and Gallows – Small package to Gallows (6:39)
We’re not done on the Kickoff Show as we have MizTV with special guest Finn Balor. Miz asks what the deal is with the long entrance and Finn says it’s the Balor Club. That doesn’t quite make sense as Miz wants to know what it takes to get into the Balor Club. Finn puts it up to the crowd who approve of Maryse but not so much of Miz.
We hear about Balor’s success worldwide but Miz thinks Finn might feel like a failure. Balor mentions all the injuries he suffered in a match that he still managed to win and become the Universal Champion. Miz mentions all the time away and asks what’s next for Balor. Finn makes it simple: he wants his title back.
Miz brings up Lesnar being the Beast but Balor is ready to fight a bigger man, just like he has for his entire career. A fight is about to break out but Miz hides behind Maryse. Miz isn’t worth the beating so Finn goes to leave, only to have Miz call him out. One Sling Blade later and Miz is quickly shut up as Finn destroys the set.
The opening video is a simple look at the matches with a theme of retribution. Nothing special but it’s all it needed to be.
US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens
Owens is defending after taking the title from Jericho at Wrestlemania. Kevin bails to the floor to start and gets sent into the announcers’ table to let Jericho take over. Owens has to roll away from a Jericho dive to the floor but makes the stupid decision to roll back inside, allowing Jericho to hit a top rope elbow to the jaw.
The springboard dropkick is broken up and Owens nails the Cannonball against the barricade. We hit the chinlock (Owens: “ASK HIM!”) as Cole continues running down both guys’ resumes. One heck of a clothesline drops Jericho again and it’s right back to the chinlock. Back up and Jericho misses a charge but gets in a quick enziguri for two of his own.
A superkick out of the corner gives Owens two more and the Cannonball is good for the same. The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered with a hurricanrana into the Walls. Owens gets to the ropes by a finger again so Jericho crushes the hand beneath the steps. The bad hand means Owens can’t hit the Pop Up Powerbomb so it’s back to the Walls for the tap out and the title at 14:06, sending Jericho over to Smackdown.
Result: Chris Jericho b. Kevin Owens – Walls of Jericho (14:06)
Jericho signs a kid’s List on the way up the ramp.
Cruiserweight Title: Neville vs. Austin Aries
Neville is defending in another Wrestlemania rematch where Neville raked the eyes to retain the title. An armdrag and a running shoulder in the corner have Neville flummoxed early on and it’s time to lay on the top rope. It’s way too early for the 450 though as Neville dropkicks the rope for the break.
We’re already in the chinlock for a bit before Aries fights up and hits the middle rope elbow to the back. Aries sends him outside for a suicide dive, followed by a suplex back inside. A running forearm in the corner looks to set up the 450 but Neville bails out to the floor for safety. Not that it matters as Aries grabs a sunset bomb to set up the Last Chancery. Neville is in trouble but grabs the referee for the DQ at 11:19.
Result: Austin Aries b. Neville via DQ when Neville grabbed the referee (11:19)
Aries post-match protests don’t get him anywhere.
Tag Team Titles: Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Hardys
The Hardys are defending after winning the titles at Wrestlemania in a ladder match. Cesaro and Matt start things off as an OBSOLETE chant starts up. Jeff comes in for a BROTHER NERO chant and it’s almost immediately back to Matt. Cesaro and Sheamus start in on the arm but it’s right back to Jeff to speed things up. The legdrop between the legs and a seated dropkick set up the splash for two. Why does no one else ever do that?
Not that it matters as Sheamus sends him hard out to the floor and it’s time for the heat segment. Sheamus’ middle rope knee gets two and it’s off to the chinlock. Back up and Sheamus kicks him in the face with Corey calling him the “alabaster gladiator”. It’s right back to the chinlock as Jeff seems to have lost a tooth somewhere in there. He’s still able to kick Cesaro away and make the hot tag though as things pick up.
A DELETE middle rope elbow sets up the Side Effect for two. Matt’s moonsault misses though and it’s the Cesaro Swing into the Sharpshooter. A rope is quickly grabbed so Sheamus comes back in for a super White Noise in a great crash. Jeff makes a last second save but Sheamus breaks up the Twist of Fate. Sheamus powerslams Matt but Jeff makes a blind tag and hits the Swanton for the pin to retain at 12:48.
Result: Hardys b. Sheamus/Cesaro – Swanton Bomb to Sheamus (12:48)
Post match the Hardys shake their hands, only to have Sheamus and Cesaro turn on them and beat them up.
Braun Strowman promises to hurt Roman Reigns.
Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Bayley
Bayley is defending in her hometown. Bliss gets slammed to start and a knee drop gets two, followed by a long series of rams into the buckle. Alexa comes right back with a HARD shot to the head and the slow beating begins. The chinlock is quickly broken so Bliss clotheslines her back down. Bliss spends a bit too much time trash talking though and gets caught in a Stunner over the ropes.
A belly to back suplex gives Bayley two but she takes too much time going to the ropes and gets sent hard into the buckle. Bayley can’t get the super Bayley to Belly and gets pulled down with a Code Red for two. Bliss gets kneed in the face though and the Macho Elbow gets two more. A rollup gives Bayley two but the kickout sends her into the post. Bayley is so stunned that a DDT gives Bliss the pin and the title at 11:19.
Result: Alexa Bliss b. Bayley – DDT (11:19)
We recap the House of Horrors match, which means we’ll finally get to know what the heck it is. Randy Orton beat Bray Wyatt at Wrestlemania for the title and this is the gimmick rematch.
Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt
Non-title. The match is going to start in Bray’s House of Horrors and will wind up in the ring where it’s pinfall, submission or forfeiture. We go to the inside of a limo where Orton is firing himself up and wearing pants. The House of Horrors is an actual house….and a tractor goes by with no one on it. The door is locked so Orton kicks his way in and we start the rapid camera cuts.
Bray’s voice says run and he jumps Orton from behind. Randy is thrown into various things as the House of Horrors looks like an inexpensive house that is being renovated. Bray disappears but reaches through a wall to choke Orton for a second and a half. The next room has baby dolls hanging from the ceiling in various mutilated forms and we hear babies talking.
Cue Wyatt for another attack but Orton throws him through a wall. They head to another room with more dolls and some weird structure made of sticks. That goes nowhere so it’s off to a kitchen (the refrigerator says WE’RE HERE) with Orton getting the better of it. Bray tries to climb onto a counter and gets in a low blow. The refrigerator is shoved down onto Randy so Bray walks outside and steals Orton’s limo. We’ll come back to this later.
We recap Seth Rollins vs. Samoa Joe. Rollins was injured at Joe’s hands earlier this year so tonight is really just about payback.
Seth Rollins vs. Samoa Joe
Joe punches him up against the ropes to start and they’re quickly on the floor with Rollins chopping away. Seth hits the big suicide dive and a second one does just as well. The big guy gets smart and goes after the knee before hitting the suicide elbow to send Rollins over the announcers’ table. Graves: “Like a flying school bus!”
A backsplash onto the knee has Rollins screaming and his comeback is cut off almost immediately. The Knee Capper sets up the kneebar until Seth scrambles to the ropes. Joe grabs a powerbomb into a half crab into the Texas Cloverleaf but Joe is at the ropes again. Seth comes back with a Sling Blade, followed by a superkick to the neck for two of his own.
For some reason Seth tries the Buckle Bomb and the knee gives out, though it’s fine enough for a Falcon Arrow a few seconds later. The frog splash bangs the knee up even more so the cover is only good for a delayed two. The Koquina Clutch is countered with a quick rope climb but Joe grabs the hold again, only to have Seth roll over for a cradle and the pin at 16:03.
Result: Seth Rollins b. Samoa Joe – Cradle (16:03)
Wyatt arrives back at the arena and stumbles into the ring. Cue Orton from behind with a chair (no word on how he got back) to start the beatdown, including sending Wyatt over the announcers’ tables. There’s the Elevated DDT off the table and Orton follows it up with another chair to the back. Back in and the RKO is loaded up but here are the Singh Brothers to go after Orton. They’re dispatched just as quickly and there’s the RKO to Wyatt. Now it’s Jinder Mahal with the belt to Orton’s head twice in a row, setting up Sister Abigail for the pin at 4:22 shown in the ring, not counting about ten minutes in the House.
Result: Bray Wyatt b. Randy Orton – Sister Abigail (4:22 in the ring)
We recap Braun Strowman vs. Roman Reigns. Strowman destroyed Reigns in the back and has been a monster since but Roman is back to fight him off.
Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman
Reigns is very banged up coming in. He goes right after Strowman and hits a clothesline off the steps to drop the monster on the floor. The apron kick is pulled out of the air and Strowman chokeslams him onto the announcers’ table. A shoulder gets two and Reigns is reeling.
The bad shoulder is sent hard into the steps and it’s off to a waistlock back inside. Strowman misses a charge into the corner and Reigns somehow hits a Samoan drop for two. They head outside with Reigns charging at Strowman and managing to send him into the post twice in a row.
The spear gets two back inside but the second attempt hits boot. Two Superman Punches drop Braun but a third is caught in that head and arm choke. The powerslam only gets two so Strowman does it again for the pin at 11:20.
Result: Braun Strowman b. Roman Reigns – Powerslam (11:20)
Post match Strowman throws in some steps (Fans: “THANK YOU STROWMAN!”) and drops Reigns ribs first onto the steel in a big crash. Braun lifts the steps over his head and brings them crashing down onto his ribs in a cringe inducing landing. Strowman is as over as free beer in a frat house and Reigns is bleeding from the mouth (Fans: “YOU DESERVE IT!”) to end the show.
Chris Jericho b. Kevin Owens – Walls of Jericho
Austin Aries b. Neville via DQ when Neville grabbed the referee
Hardys b. Sheamus/Cesaro – Swanton Bomb to Sheamus
Alexa Bliss b. Bayley – DDT
Seth Rollins b. Samoa Joe – Cradle
Bray Wyatt b. Randy Orton – Sister Abigail
Braun Strowman b. Roman Reigns – Powerslam
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