Impact Wrestling
Date: July 13, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero, Jeremy Borash

The big story this week is whether or not Alberto El Patron has joined LAX. Last week Konnan claimed he had but Alberto was out and couldn’t confirm the announcement. Other than that we’re slowly starting the build towards Bound For Glory, though it’s still a long way off. Let’s get to it.

Grado and Joseph Park arrive in the tiny Park Park and Park car (Park: “Three more payments and its mine!”). Joseph has a plan to keep Grado in this country: he needs to get married. And to one of the Knockouts!

Recap of last week’s ending with LAX attacking Lashley and claiming that Alberto is the newest member.

Opening sequence.

Here’s LAX with Konnan saying that Alberto is the newest member. Cue Alberto to ask what’s going on because he’s not joining LAX. Konnan talks about what happens to Mexican wrestlers in this country, including what happened to him in Stamford. Alberto rants about how he remembers every day but he’s not joining LAX to fight back. It’s a flat out no on joining the team so Konnan sends the troops after him. Lashley comes out for the save.

The Mayor of Orlando declared last Wednesday Impact Wrestling Day in Orlando. They also honored the victims of the Pulse nightclub shootings.

ACH is ready to win the Super X Cup.

Andrew Everett is ready to win the Super X Cup.

Super X Cup First Round: ACH vs. Andrew Everett

Everett nips up to start as the announcers talk about how big it is to have Alberto and Lashley teaming up tonight. They trade kicks and standing switches until Everett kicks ACH in the head for two. A springboard dropkick puts ACH on the floor and a top rope Asai moonsault makes things even worse. ACH gets tired of getting kicked and comes back with kicks and a dive of his own, followed by a German suplex. A running clothesline drops Everett but he pops up with an enziguri. Not that it matters as ACH comes right back with a brainbuster to advance at 6:22.

Result: ACH b. Andrew Everett – Brainbuster (6:22)

Here’s Gail Kim with a big announcement. She announces her retirement at the end of the year. She plans on going out on top though and that means she’ll be back in the ring later in the year.

As Gail is leaving, Chris Adonis comes out to yell at the Swoll Mates (who are here to promote a TV show and not wrestling) and challenge them to a pose down. The Mates are far bigger than he is so Eli Drake comes out to prevent anything from going wrong.

Demus vs. Octagoncito

It’s a minis match though in this case, minis means people about Rey Mysterio’s size as they’re both taller than the top rope. Octagoncito sends him outside for a spring corkscrew dive. Anther dive drops Demus back inside but he comes right back with a slam for two of his own. Something like the West Coast Pop gives Octagoncito two and a very spinning headscissors puts Demus away at 3:57.

Result: Octagoncito b. Demus – Spinning headscissors (3:57)

Grado hits on various Knockouts to little success. Park says we have one more chance and brings out champagne and chocolates to make things easier.

Grand Championship: Moose vs. Naomichi Marufuji

Moose is defending and Ethan Carter III is on commentary. Moose misses the Game Changer but ducks a kick to the head for a standoff. They trade big swings until Moose drops him with a hard clothesline. Marufuji gets caught in the corner as the announcers can’t get Storm to say a word.

Moose wins round one and blasts Marufuji with a clothesline at the opening bell. Back up and Marufuji finally gets in some offense, including some chops in the corner. A dropkick knocks Marufuji off the top though and round two ends with Marufuji down on the floor. Marufuji wins round two and round three begins after a break. Moose misses a clothesline and gets kneed in the face a few times. Carter, who hasn’t said a word yet, gets off commentary but comes in with the bell to knock out Marufuji with the bell for the DQ at 14:08.

Result: Naomichi Marufuji b. Moose via DQ when Ethan Carter III interfered (14:08)

LAX wants revenge tonight.

William Weeks vs. Trevor Lee

Lee still has the X-Division Title and insists on wearing it while he wrestles out of fear of theft. With Weeks being beaten down, Sonjay Dutt is being held back by security. A double stomp ends Weeks at 1:24.

Result: Trevor Lee b. William Weeks – Double stomp (1:24)

Dutt chases Lee off but can’t get the title back.

Ava Storie vs. Laurel Van Ness

Storie hammers away but gets suplexed down for two. Choking looks to set up the curb stomp but Ava slips away and grabs a neckbreaker. The curb stomp puts Ava away at 3:22.

Result: Laurel Van Ness b. Ava Storie – Curb stomp (3:22)

Post match Grado heads to the ring and asks Laurel out. He praises everything about her and she doesn’t say no but Kongo Kong heads out to chase Grado off.

Alberto El Patron/Bobby Lashley vs. LAX

Non-title. Lashley suplexes and backbreakers Ortiz for two to start before handing it off to Alberto for right hands in the corner. Santana cheats from the apron though and a double suplex is good for two on Alberto. Back with Alberto hitting a reverse superplex on Santana, allowing the hot tag off to Lashley.

Diamante breaks up the spear though and Santana gets in a cheap shot to keep control. LAX works Lashley over with the double teaming until he flips out of a double belly to back and crossbodies both of them down at the same time. Alberto comes in with a Backstabber to Ortiz and the top rope double stomp finishes Santana at 13:27.

Result: Alberto El Patron/Lashley b. LAX – Top rope double stomp to Santana (13:27)

Post match Alberto says he and Lashley were an awesome team but LAX jumps him from behind. Lashley smiles and walks away to end the show.

ACH b. Andrew Everett – Brainbuster
Octagoncito b. Demus – Spinning headscissors
Naomichi Marufuji b. Moose via DQ when Ethan Carter III interfered
Trevor Lee b. William Weeks – Double stomp
Laurel Van Ness b. Ava Storie – Curb stomp
Alberto El Patron/Lashley b. LAX – Top rope double stomp to Santana


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